Joblessness is off the charts in Pretoria and Johannesburg. So much so that people have asked me for job opportunities. This is because I make videos. But my videos make zero money. It just helps with web traffic at this point.
But you don’t need to make videos to know that there’s a serious unemployment issue in these cities. Just drive around and look.
Continue reading “Jobs | An Article for South Africans”
Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares is an entertaining show—but also kind of uncomfortable to watch. From an emotional awareness perspective certain ingredients are always present in these episodes.
It is nearly always the case that a restaurant owner (or chef) will say that he would love to have input from someone like Gordon Ramsay. That is, until he actually gets it. Before Gordon arrives, people are excited about his visit. This excitement only lasts until Gordon tastes the food.
Continue reading “Kitchen Nightmares”
If you watch YouTube a lot, you might have seen adverts that promise huge transformations in just a few minutes a day.
Continue reading “In Only A Few Minutes A Day”
Never ignore the little voice in your head. I’m not talking about that incessant monkey mind that worries about everything. And I’m not talking about the big bombastic voice that’s always critical. I’m talking about that subtle, intuitive voice that occasionally warns us that something is just not right.
That voice isn’t fear-based and it doesn’t shout instructions. It’s often a soft nudge that makes you notice something strange. Or it’s a feeling that asks, What feels wrong here? Or it can be a voice of clarity that says, You know, you really shouldn’t sign that contract. Whatever the case, we’ve all ignored that little voice at times.
But if we can learn to be attuned to that voice, if we can learn to stop and pay attention when it speaks, we might be able to navigate difficulties better. In some cases, we might even be able to prevent catastrophes.
Here are a few key reasons why we sometimes fail to listen:
Continue reading “That Little Voice”
Of all emotions, jealousy is one that can be the most destructive.
When this emotion gets out of hand one might become wholly destabilised and utterly destructive. Feelings of inadequacy is often at the root of jealousy. And this feeling can be quite unbearable. Sometimes, complete destruction (or self-sabotage) is favoured over turning inward to face the jealousy.
Continue reading “Emotional Work: Jealousy”
In very simple terms, emotional integration is when the internal charge of an uncomfortable emotion dissolves.
The tricky thing is this: We are often unaware of stuffed down emotions. We might not be aware of every single thing that we felt during a traumatic event. Some things stay buried for very long.
On one level, we know that we’ve integrated a trauma when we no longer feel charged emotion when we think about the associated event. But that is not to say that there isn’t still some stuff beneath the surface of our awareness.
I’ve often been baffled by how many layers of emotion a traumatic event can contain. When the charge of a specific situation doesn’t dissolve quickly or instantly, we might need to re-investigate what’s going on inside.
Continue reading “What is emotional integration? (Extended Version)”
The worst thing about smartphones is that it takes one out of the present moment. There are so many things that we can do instead—important things that are more enriching. Pick up a book—a physical book—and read. Read more. Play an instrument. Paint. Create something.
Continue reading “The Worst Thing About Smartphones”
Finish lines are idealised destinations that cannot grant us the happiness that we so desperately crave. An idealised destination is only a happy place in our head. Perfect external circumstances can never lead to inner peace. Inner peace must be cultivated from the inside out.
There are many reasons why we resist difficult feelings. One reason comes from an inner sense that we do not want someone to have power over us. The person can be someone close, or it can be someone who has disappointed us in the past. Whatever the case, there’s usually an inner dialogue that sounds like this: “I refuse to feel sad about what that person said. I will not allow them to have power over me.”
Continue reading “Emotional Work: Resisting Difficult Feelings”