Meaning is often seen as a good thing. We want the work that we do to be meaningful. We want our relationships to be meaningful. We attach a lot of value to meaning because we believe that a big, important “why” will counterbalance the inevitable difficulties of the “how.” This idea has merit, but attaching too much meaning to something can also be burdensome. Meaning can bring a certain amount of expectation and heaviness.
This is particularly evident in how much emphasis some people place on their wedding day, for example. The day is taken as an incredibly important event that will somehow determine the success or failure of the rest of the union. People believe that everything must be perfect on that day otherwise all is lost. I might be generalising somewhat here, but it’s important to point out that placing so much expectation on one day has the potential to, not only disappoint, but also drain the day of joy. If anything, placing less emphasis and meaning on your wedding day might make it more fun and relaxed. But more importantly, one day cannot counterbalance years of more mundane interactions and conversations. If there is no respect or appreciation on the regular days, then forget about how extravagant the wedding was.
But we can place too much meaning in small things too. I see the same thing with certain posts that I want to write. I deem certain topics more important than others, so I have this inner dialogue that says, Better not screw this one up. This can be good because it forces me to bring my best game, but it can also be paralysing. If I consider something is too significant, too large, I end up not working on it at all. So, placing a lot of importance on something, can have a kind of paralysing effect. That paralysis might mean that you’re not taking any action at all.
The antidote to this, as with most things, is to bring more presence to the tiny steps and to release the expectations. Drop the meaning, in other words, and just focus on what is in front of you right now.