Tag: self-awareness

Why do emotional work?

For me the main reason I started doing emotional work more consistently was because certain aspects of my life simply became unmanageable. Certain habits (like smoking) were negatively affecting my health. I was struggling with my health in general. I was absolutely exhausted on a regular basis. I was struggling creatively. Struggling to stick to an exercise program, struggling to be consistent in my personal efforts. The list goes on.

I have, in the past, tried to convince people in my life to do emotional work. This probably stemmed from my own suffering, a sense of wanting to save, or at least spare people some pain. But the truth is that no one should convince someone else to do emotional work. It’s too difficult. It’s really a decision that is made on a personal level.

What is emotional work and why it’s difficult

My brother once asked me if I really think “emotional work” is work. My reply to him was, Yes, it is! Emotional work has more to do with awareness and going on an inner journey than doing something in the world—but it is still work. You have to intentionally feel emotions that you’ve been running away from for years. And this is very, very difficult.

What exactly is emotional work? In short, to me it means being with some uncomfortable emotion that you would rather ignore or suppress. It’s becoming aware of an emotion in your physical body and being with that emotion. Looking at what is actually going on in your heart, or solar plexus, or throat, or body. Looking at the discomfort inside, those feelings that you’ve avoided for years.

Is it really that simple?

No.

And there are a few reasons why.

The emotional journey is challenging

There really are no words to convey how difficult the emotional journey can be. This is possibly why artists draw devils and dragons to depict their inner turmoil. Emotional work is not easy, convenient, or even something that can be neat and orderly. It’s a messy business and one that will make you feel that you are dying on the inside. But, for me, it eventually became necessary.