The one thing that I work on continuously is internal integrity. In simple terms, internal integrity is the ability stay on track no matter what is happening around us. It is our ability to stick to our own rules. These rules might pertain to health, work, relationships, career or whatever, but it is usually intentions that are important to us personally. These rules can be habits (exercise daily) or it can be a way of being (an intention to be mindful). Whatever the case, it is the small but important things that we do daily, weekly, monthly to lead a meaningful, good life. Internal integrity prevents us from constantly making excuses.
Internal integrity is the thing that allows us to move in the direction of our dreams because if our intentions align with the direction that we are moving in, then we are on our path. Conversely, if we have intentions to do something but always end up being pulled away from the important actions, then we’re not on our path. This seems obvious but not necessarily easy to do. I have to constantly guard against too many daily distractions. There are so many things that ignite emotions of outrage and fear on the media and elsewhere. Internal integrity helps us to not get distracted by these things.
Internal integrity is not something that someone else can assess for us. It is the one thing that we must assess for ourselves. It is not a test that we can half-heartedly study for. It requires us to be brutally honest with ourselves.
I have periods of time where I fall into emotional turbulence. Yes, even after years of dedicated emotional work, this still happens. During these times I often feel myself slipping out of internal integrity. This usually takes the form of going into mental loops about circumstances and not prioritising my daily exercise, writing, reading etc. If I’m going around in fear or anger loops, I have less energy for creativity, health and those relationships that matter. As simple as that.
It is easy to neglect the important things and constantly tend to the outer things that trigger us emotionally. In some ways it can also be comfortable because if we are captivated by whatever is going on out there, then we have no time to turn inward. Turning inward requires courage. It’s not always easy to face the discomfort in our own hearts. But when we tend to ourselves and our own pain, we move into internal integrity. At this point, we are longer trying to fix something out there but working on our own internal discordance.
Cultivating internal integrity is a difficult and long process, but it is the way to move beyond the immature parts of ourselves.